Carolyn F’s Neighborhood

Not feeling altogether healthy today, so have been lying a little upon my bed. I have the blinds open and a crow is spending large amounts of time sitting on the lamp post outside my bedroom window and looking in at me. It flies away and then returns to take up its post again. I am not overly superstitious, but I am starting to get a little spooked out by the damn crow. I would indeed like to stone the damn thing.

FD and the crow : not friends at all

Look you saggy bag of black feathers take your business somewhere else! SHOO!

Yesterday Mr FD and I experienced two ends of customer service - the good, the bad and the bad was ugly.

As mentioned in a previous post, Mr FD and I have been in the process of buying a car for the company that Mr FD is currently setting up. He started some two week ago on this process and he told everyone involved that he needed the car to leave on an extended trip last Monday. He just wanted the basic car, happy to choose from the colours on the show floor. Wanted no extras - oh except floor mats which now cost $180AUS for 4 rubber floor mats! Mr FD made call after call, repeating his need and his deadline. No one listened. They all heard what they wanted to hear, and then covered up with excuses of "fax didn't arrive" ,  "missed the deadline and head office won't process until tomorrow" and "they are out of the office and I'll leave theme a message" . Where do you leave the message? On the toilet wall of the business next door?

Anyway, we finally got the call to collect the car. We made an appointment for 2.30pm. When we arrived our saleswoman was nowhere to be seen. She was out on a test drive with another customer, even though we had an appointment and knew Mr FD had to leave that afternoon on an extended trip. A number of salesmen walked by us without even acknowledging that we were human and breathed. Eventually we made enough noise to be noticed and demanded to be served. A very junior member of the team took us through signing the papers and then she found a poor salesman who had a leg in a cast and couldn't make an exit to go through the car with Mr. FD. I made little effort to make small talk with Junior Girl as she kept up this charade of our Saleswoman returning at any moment, weeping over her unintended absence. Oh yeah.

An hour later we are driving out of the show room and Saleswoman appears. She throws herself in fron of our car and reefs open Mr. FD's door and screams "Congratulations " as though we had just given birth and not gone into spasms more of heart breaking debt. Then she plants a big lipsticky kiss on his cheek, something that normally would have his heart go into overdrive. THEN she runs to the otherside of the car and reefs open MY door, and rubs her cheek against mine. I take particular note of her name badge and facial features to add her to my stick list. I had never met this woman before, Mr FD had only ever spoken to her over the phone. Not a word of "sorry" even though "I knew that you were driving an hour to get here, and had an appointment with me, and were short of time". Nope, She had our money and she was onto the next sale. Customer service? I think not. Next company car, and there will be one or two or three, won't be bought from her.

On the other side, earlier that morning, a real estate salesman left his comatose mother to drive over an hour to bring some papers to us for signing as he knew Mr. FD needed to sign them before he left yesterday. [We are renting warehouse space]. While we were signing, the LOVELY [HANDSOME] Salesman received a phone call to inform him that his mother had just woken from the coma. She had been involved in a car accident a day or so previously. So this man spends 3 hours away from his possibly dying mother as he knew how important his role was in the next step of Mr FD's business. [If we had known before the meeting we would have gone to his office]

Wait there is a 3rd tale of service. Mr FD is in the seed business, pasture seed mainly. He had bought some seed and organized for it to be sent to a depot for delivery. Yesterday morning there is a knock at our front door, Mr FD goes outside and there is a delivery truck driver outside. The delivery man says "Got a pallet of seed, here for you, mate." They sent the damn seed to our residential address despite Mr FD making it obvious the residential address was for billing purposes only! The poor delivery driver had in fact alerted his office that they were sending him to a residential address with a pallet of seed, but they wouldn't listen or double check the details, so the poor delivery driver drove across town only to be told that "yes, that is right, this is the wrong address", and to have to drive back across town to the depot.

So not only are they giving bad customer service to their customers but they are giving bad customer service to each other. Your co-workers deserve as much as your customers, if not more.

To me, it is easier to do the right thing, and to do the right thing first time around than to do to the pretence dance. And if MR FD asks you to help him make a deadline - just remember there is a Flamingo Dancer with a stick list standing behind him.

[Stick list : list of names of all the people I am going to hit with a stick one day soon]

Daughter1 just sent me the following quote of the day. Needless to say I agree with it!

'Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of sh-t.'  

For years and years I've wondered.  I have so many memories & pictures that help remind me those memories were real.  Yesterday I made the connection with one of those voices from the past.  It was quick, the lunch bell was about to ring & I had to go.  The picture made me smile- he looks different than I remember.  But then again, he asked if I was still that skinny little girl with knobby knees.

There was a piece connecting us I chose to have no contact with.  Because of this, so much was lost.  However, there are many blessings to come about because that piece is no longer. 

Let the reunions continue!!!

spoil sport : 1930s

A curious sign on a gate in the countryside, reading: Please do not spit, or throw stones, etc. in field. No trespassers allowed'. Grange- over-Sands, Lancashire.

The world is going to hell in a hand basket. But it is no one's fault.

When we were building our house a few years ago, everytime we questioned a mistake or poor workmanship we were told that "the apprentice did that". They always blamed the youngest and newest member of the team. The last few days we have been trying to sort out financing and purchase of a company car. The excuse this time is that "we didn't get the fax". This is also an excuse I was given frequently from publishers when I worked in the Basement of Discontent. No one ever says "I made a mistake", "I didn't  notice" or "I can't locate it". The blame is always put back onto someone else, or back on you. The fax didn't arrive it must mean you made a mistake/didn't send it/whatever guilt they can apply to you.

Then you have to make a series of phone calls just to get someone to refax the damn thing. When you do, they tell you that you missed the cut of by 46 seconds and they can't do anything about it until next day. Sorry, even if it is heart transplant surgery and you are lying with your chest ripped open and your dying heart exposed waiting for the replacement, if you can't get off that table and refax your form then there is nothing they can do.

I hate being cynical, but it is all getting to much. The same people think that customer service is speaking poilitely to you, and being friendly and smiling, not actually doing their job in a speedy and efficient manner. Actually complete a simple task in the time available - they say no, no, no!

I have spent a long time in various service positions and I have always found that the easiest way to do my job was to do it efficently and as soon as possible. It actually decreased the stress in my life, and made other people happy. Win/win situation for all. Problems got attended to immediately and flexibility a given. From little things big things don't always have to grow.

So, I can't help but wonder when these same people all arrive to speak with the Big Whatever just what excuses they will give. Who will they blame? When they lie dying on their hospital bed, who will they blame for all the wrongs they did? Will the messes in their lives be thrown upon the shoulders of someone else? I suspect they will revert to habit and look for a scapegoat, but they will really know, won't they? They will know that they could have done better. And if there is any justice in the world, if the Big Whatever turns them away from the doorstep, I hope the Big Whatever just gives one shrug of the mighty shoulders and says "Not my fault, it was all up to you.".

Is that a dragon I see before me?

Night 1:

Flamingo Dancer returns from the bathroom and Mr FD asks:

"Did you see any dragons?"

"Yes," said I. "They were bar-b-queing the yaks"

"I hope there are some leftovers for breakfast" he says and goes back to sleep.

Night 2:

Mr FD returns from the bathroom and I  ask:

"Did you see any dragons?"

"Dragons!" Mr FD exclaims. "I am sick of slaying dragons. Day in, day out, nothing but dragon slaying. At least they could keep it down to one a day." He returns to bed and goes back to sleep.

Dragons and yaks in our backyard...the neighbours are not going to be happy at all.

We have finished Le Grande Coq and moved onto a Cockfighter's Ghost...is anyone sensing a theme here? Besides drinking and happy dancing in celebration that is. Language is no barrier.

Cockfighter's ghost : Named after a ghostly steed, said to reside upon Pooles Rock vineyard

viewing the light at the end of the tunnel

I had a great moment early yesterday morning, as I sat in the lecturer theatre waiting for the conference to begin and for my scheduled time to present my conference paper. Well, I had a couple actually, but one was earth shattering.

On the very first day of my studies this year, I struggled with flipping the lecturer table up on my seat in the first lecture hall and I had to be shown how to get the damn thing into position. Yesterday morning, in a totally different lecturer theatre, I saw my neighbour struggling with her lecturer table and assisted her to get it up and into place. I laughed and said what a sense of achievement I felt from that one little thing. It seemed to represent in some way the long journey that I have been on this year. Of course the sage in front of me laughed and said 'let's hope that is not all we have learnt this year'. It wouldn't have mattered all that much if it was, as I have changed so much over this year, met some wonderful people, who, while I know they won't stay in my life after this week, have contributed to a very profound expreince for me.

I was reading the conference booklet, looking at all the great papers being presented that day, and feeling my nervousness mounting, when my tutor walked by. I wish such a teacher on every student at some stage in their life, and hopefully at a time when they can gain most from them. She turned and called out to me 'Flamingo Dancer! You are going to be great today, you have written a really fantastic paper and your power point slides are wonderful!' I said that I guessed it was only a half hour of my life, but I was still feeling nervous. And then she stopped and thought a moment and she smiled and said ' Think of it this way, you are presenting for all the people in the world who suffer anxiety because of their difficulties with perfectionism'. And at that moment, I calmed down. She was right, as here I was having a chance to present to a group of educators a problem that I know has severely handicapped the lives of several people I know and more than a few students I saw while prac teaching. If my few simple words made an imprint on one of them, and they could help one person as a result, and even though I will never know that, I will have lived a life well lived.

I was 3rd to present. It was a good position as we were all fresh and not yet uncomforatble from sitting for too long. I was happy with my performance. Well, I am Flamingo Dancer after all! Actually I was more than pleased with my presentation because when I started this degree course I was so frightened at the thought of standing up in front of my peers and speaking that I really worried whether I would be able to complete the course. Now I can stand up in front of a room of strangers and speak. Maybe sometimes it is incoherent, or dribble, but damn I can do it.

Afterwards a couple of people came up to me and said how much they enjoyed my presentation and how they identified many aspects of their own personalities in what I had described. I suspect that most university students suffer from perfectionism to some degree, how else do they stay the course? Of course we all have to write 'attention to detail' on our resume, don't we? So we are expected to be perfectionists, even though it makes our life unhappy  and often derails our learning. I felt please anyway, because I had delivered my message and hopefully the message will be passed on.

At the end of the day, most of my colleagues were going for drinks, but I was exhausted and had arranged for Son to pick me up anyway. I must admit that sitting from 8.30am to 5.30pm with just a lunch break and a couple of toilet breaks really put my back and neck into painful zones, so I really did just want to go home. They didn't need Flamingo Dancer dancing on the tables and telling everyong that she loved them in a slurred tongue. Not that I wouldn't have done it in an original memorable suprior style! 

So all I can say is - take that leap, test yourself, go for the mountain top. AGE DOESN"T MATTER!  It won't be easy and it will be scarey. At times you will be exhausted, and frightened and overwhelmed. There are no guarantees at the end. No promises that you will get a better job, or a pot of gold, but what you gain as a person, the little treasures that come your way on the journey are worth every moment of the journey, pain and all. Join the parade.